Shock

Shock, indeed. We are baffled, humbled, and yet feel so undeserving. We asked for a little help in raising some money to help with lodging costs for the hubs and Eli to stay nearby while Renn is in the hospital, as well as for past and future medical bills. We felt sick to our stomachs for asking. We felt so guilty for admitting that we needed help... $3,100 worth, to be exact. We thought that even if we got 1/4 of that, that it would be a blessing. But, within less than 48hrs...

 

It was honestly the best birthday present this momma could have hoped for. We don't know how on earth we can thank all of our friends, the family members, and the many strangers who showed love and support for our family.

When we broke the news to Renn that Daddy and Eli were going to be able to stay close to the hospital and not have to go home, his eyes said it all. They welled up with tears as he said, "But, how?!" God bless each and every one of you. Seriously... We can't thank you enough.

I'd also like to take this time to give a special thank you to a very sweet, generous person. Her name is Janelle Dill. She, too, has Epilepsy and has been the most selfless supporter of Renn's, from the very beginning. We have never met in person, but she has hand-crafted some incredible Star Wars themed stuff all for Renn to enjoy. She made him a calendar, and most recently sent him a lightsaber, along with some glow sticks, fun markers, and the COOLEST scroll that officially promoted our Jedi from Padawan to Master. Somehow, she even managed to have Master Yoda and Master Kenobi sign the certificate, themselves! ;) And then, she did something that touched me even more... She made me a beautiful flower pin, and gave me a small bottle of Frankincense and Myrrh scented bath crystals. What a darling she is. She has also put Renn on a prayer list at her church, and some time ago, they sent Renn a box of Sunshine. They gave him crayons, TONS of goodies, coloring books... the list goes on! And they sent him cards and cards and cards. My goodness... Let me say, she has made our family smile SO much!!

Janelle has a documentary on YouTube, and I would like to share Part 1. Yes, it is a bit long, BUT she gives great insight to what Epilepsy means and how it affects each person it touches. She even goes into the history of where the word Epilepsy came from, and when it was discovered. Genius! Janelle can't have certain foods or be around flashing lights, where as Renn has zero triggers. Epilepsy is very different for everyone.

 Janelle, you are SUCH a sweetheart! (We even have the same necklace!) Thank you for your love, kindness, and support. You truly brighten our day. Your song choice by one of my most favorite groups, Plumb, spoke to me so strongly. Thank you for being a great advocate, for teaching others, and for inspiring so many who are struggling with Epilepsy.

So... Shock. We are still in it. But we are also feeling the love. So, so much love. Thank you all for your donations, for your cards, for your calls and messages. The countdown is definitely on. As we prepare, please know how much we feel your love and how thankful we are for it.

God bless!

May the LORD now show you kindness and faithfulness, and I too will show you the same favor because you have done this.
2 Samuel 2:6

Support... Not an Easy Thing to Ask for

Renn has adjusted back to school with pure Jedi perfection. We've been amazed at how quickly his hair has grown back, and how well his scars are healing.

That being said, we got the call today.

Yeah. THE call.

Renn's next (and prayerfully LAST) step will take place on October 28th. We will be going in, placing a grid on the right side of his brain, and then wait for about a week for seizure activity. After we get what we need, he'll have one more surgery.

And that's the one that has us depending fully on God. The kind of trust that you go into 100% blind. The kind that you pray and pray that it's Him directing you, and not some whim.

We are a bit unnerved, tonight, but we are at peace. We've been praying for peace this whole time... We really do have it.

The hubs and I are at a crossroads now, though. We live so far from UCSF, and our deepest desire is to have all four of us be together during this ordeal. But it's looking like the Ronald McDonald house is not going to be a possibility. We can't afford to pay the medical bills that lay before us AND have the hubs and Eli come stay in San Francisco with us. So, we have set up a page on GoFundMe.org, and are asking that you spread the word.

We hate from the bottom of our souls to even ask. The hubs and I are both avid believers in working hard and earning every dime. But we can see how out of control this is for us. So if you could, please share the link at the bottom of this page! Let everyone know that Renn needs his daddy and his brother by his side. It means SO much to us.

Thank you for your love and support. Even if it's through prayer, that is by far more important than any dollar amount.

We will keep you updated. There's more to come as the hubs gets ready to donate blood to Renn for the blood transfusion(s) he will need, as well as some surprises for our sweet Jedi.

God bless you ALL.

 

RENN'S GOFUNDME PAGE

Press HERE

A Good, Hard Look

Happy Labor Day!

We have been home for two nights now, and they have come with some unexpected emotion. I honestly slept all day on Sunday, while Renn adjusted back to walking around. He was surprisingly weak on his feet. That tore us a new one, for sure. But Eli was thrilled to have his brother back, and the hubs felt whole once again.

I wanted to share what, exactly, we see when we look at our blessing... I'm going to warn you now, because if you have a weak stomach, you might want to just stop here. I promise it's not unbearable, or gross, but I want to warn you nonetheless.



So, while we were in the hospital, Renn's head remained covered up. I had no idea what his head actually looked like, but I swear, my imagination really ran away with it. I was picturing HOLES. Holes with wires. However when Renn's turban dressing lifted up on Wednesday night, I was in for a bit of shock. And relief.

Looks straight out of Star Trek, doesn't it? It was so strange to see, but not at all frightening. Instantly I figured out how it all worked, and I wasn't so bothered, worried, or afraid. Although I had only seen one of four, for some reason I slept a little bit easier that night.




 Now, Dr. Incredi-Surgeon obviously had to reopen those incisions and remove the wires. We were given permission to take off his bandages when we got home, but we could not wash his hair until Monday night (tonight). The problem was, he also had an insurmountable layer of the most solid glue on the back of his hair, due to them adding two external electrodes there for his VEEG. But, we took the bandages off, and what we saw was a bit more difficult to endure.

Of course we were curious as to how we were going to handle school after the holiday... Renn said he was fine with the way his hair looked and he was insistent that we not cut it. While I thought that was absurd, I agreed to let him make his own choice.

We had a serious case of the "four-wallers", as you can imagine, by the time this morning came around. Renn was shockingly clingy and mentioned several times that he was scared of going to school tomorrow. He followed me all over the house... My brave Jedi. How do you console your child when you are equally afraid of what's to come?

The hubs decided we would go out to breakfast. Upon getting ready, I looked at Renn's head and saw how terribly difficult it was going to be to get that glue out of his hair tonight. He is the second most tender-headed person I have ever met- the first being his daddy. So I made a tough, last minute decision... I was going to shave his head.

It was the only way to get that glue out. It broke my heart to see him cry. I felt like I was robbing him of his identity. And though I knew it would grow back soon, watching him cower and yell, "Why can't you just leave me the way I am?! Don't you like me for me?! I just want to be me!" broke me. We'd been through it, and I'd truly underestimated my own emotions, and completely ignored his.

I felt like the worst mother. Once again, all the feelings of uncertainty and the WHAT AM I DOING TO HIM?? questions came back, piercing my heart. After the torturous act was over, I put him in the tub, gently washing his glue-ridden hair off his weak body. Would it have been that bad letting him keep his hair? Was it my vanity, my fear of the other kids at school, or the fact that I knew the tidiest task of removing that glue would be the most difficult ending to this day, that caused me to shave his head? At that moment, I thought I'd broken Renn's delicate trust, forever.

All in all, his smile eventually returned. He looked like Daddy, now! We let him eat breakfast at the restaurant without wrapping his wounds up. We had so many stares... Stares of sympathy, worry, and fear for our Jedi. I'm not going to lie, I walked around ready to punch anyone who even stared a millisecond too long. I was raging, and ready. But to my dismay, no one even looked sideways. Praise Jesus.

We wrapped Renn's head, and took the boys to the zoo. It was there where I saw a sign from God... One that reminded me that I was not alone in my worry or fear for Renn. It was a blessing... Though he's only four, Eli is an old soul and a sweet, sweet caring brother. I captured this, when they had no clue I was even looking. We ended up having a great day at the zoo... Phones, minds, and worries went silent. It was heaven.



Tomorrow, Renn goes back to school. I plan on talking to the kids in his class about Epilepsy and what it all means. I want to show the kids that there is nothing to be afraid of and most of all, nothing to make fun of. Hopefully Renn won't be afraid.

We are now waiting for the phone to ring regarding Renn's next surgery... But I got a good, hard look at many things this past weekend. We are not yet prepared for the next step, but we are obviously learning how to embrace it, along with cherish each day in the month that we have until it comes.

We hope you guys have had a marvelous three-day weekend! Here's to fall... Our favorite time of the year.

 

Why are you in despair, my soul? Why are you disturbed within me? Hope in God! For I shall still praise him for the saving help of his presence.
Psalm 42:5

 

 

Burr Hole Galaxy: Day 5

 We woke up in the wee hours of the morning only to discover that Renn's IV had fallen out once again. The poor Jedi... He'd had the hardest time falling asleep last night. I think the weight of yesterday was holding him down, and he was worried about things that he didn't even understand.

Around 11pm, I saw him staring at the wall. I asked if he was okay, and the look of grief took over his young face.

"I'm just... I'm just... I don't know, Mommy."

I held his hand and promised he could tell me anything. Then I asked him if he heard things today that might have upset him (which I was praying was not the case. I was not prepared to have this conversation, because I haven't even wrapped my own brain and emotions around it). Renn's eyes looked straight down. They were distant and full of fear.

 

"I'm sad, Mommy. I don't like to see you cry."

 

Lord, thank you for giving me a child with such a tender heart.

 

So, I cuddled with him. I laid in that stupid hospital bed, breaking all the PICU rules, and I held my wise Jedi. He shouldn't be concerned about ME. I assured him that I was crying because I love him more than anything. I was honest with how angry I am that this is happening to him. But we both agreed that God was running the show. And with that (and a couple sips of milk), he fell asleep.

 

 

Two hours later, we were faced with having to give him a new IV. Luckily, we had an incredible nurse who thought it best to let him sleep until he absolutely NEEDED his antibiotic. So, at 3:45am, we just made it happen. Not. Fun. It took only two tries this time, and he handled it with more grace than I wanted to.

 

At 7am, we were whisked off to pre-op, awaiting his 7:30am surgery to remove the electrode strips. Dr. Incredi-Genius greeted us with some lovely, hilarious jokes, and just like that I was walking him into the OR. I got to be with him when he fell asleep. I looked each one of the nurses and neuro assistants in the eyes, and knew God's angels were looking back at me.
 

 

Within a couple hours, Renn was back in his room in the PICU safe and sound. He woke pretty easily, and immediately wanted to take this picture for Daddy. He said, "I want Daddy to see that I'm okay and happy."

 

 

We played, we got excited about going home, and then Dr. Genius walked in and he and I discussed more and more about what's to come. And you know what I realized?

We asked for prayer about this whole surgery.

We asked that our family and friends pray that the discharges causing the seizures were coming from ONE side.

 

And you see, despite what is happening next, God answered that prayer.

 

Now we need to determine if the discharges are starting in the Frontal lobe or the Temporal lobe. We went over all the options. We discussed all the side effects, possibilities, pros, and cons. I can't say that I feel at total peace with this decision... yet. But, I can clearly see that God gave us what we asked for. So maybe, just maybe there's hope in this. Maybe we aren't making a bad choice. Maybe God is showing us that this was His plan. I'm still not so sure, but I acknowledge that I have a little over a month to enjoy each and every moment with my boy. My Jedi. Then, October will come and change our lives forever...

 

So now, I pray for peace. Tomorrow is another sunrise, another chance to wake up in a hospital that has running water, sterile equipment, and the most up-to-date technology, and it's another day that I get to see all the gifts God has given us. And best of all, tomorrow...

 

...we go home.

 

 

 

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.
John 14:27

Burr Hole Galaxy: Day 4

I posted the following on Facebook, at 4:30 this morning:

I totally jinxed our night of full sleep... Over zealous nurse, and Renn kicked his IV out (it was on his ankle) so they had to put in a new one at 2am. They tried THREE TIMES, and it didn't work. I got so mad I wanted to scream; Renn WAS screaming... They gave up and said they'd talk to the doctor about it in the morning.

I woke up, two hours later to someone new (and our nurse) trying a FOURTH time.... Did it work? NO. Was I trying to figure out how I could hit one or both of these people without getting Into trouble? YES. INDEED.

Renn was screaming and crying, "Please just leave me alone!"

FIFTH attempt was a charm. Sweet baby Jesus, have mercy. Renn is back to sleep, and I'm going to try, too. Sigh... Hospitals are no fun. 

 

Fortunately, our morning actually did get better from there. Renn slept until 9:40am! The poor Jedi. But, when he did wake up, he had a great attitude, perfect smile, and I'm hoping it had nothing to do with the strawberry "milkshake" he had for breakfast.

 

We enjoyed our time together, actually getting some dreaded schoolwork done before I let him wander off into videogame land.

 

About two seconds after he started playing, Dr. Genius and his team walked in. We discussed the plan for tomorrow, and possible days to go home. Renn will be having his second surgery sometime in the morning to remove the electrode strips and wires. This surgery won't be as gruesome, but it will mean I will finally get to see what they've done to my baby's skull. It's going to be difficult, especially since I will be all on my own without the hubs (who is at home with Eli, eagerly awaiting the call that says they can come pick us up). But, it shouldn't take very long, and we might be able to head home as early as Saturday.

 

Then came harder news... Dr. Genius let me know the plan he is concocting, and it nearly made me faint. I knew, I KNEW what the next steps might entail, but I wasn't prepared to hear a time frame. It still isn't 100% going to happen, but the odds are ever increasing in its favor.

 

Now, I am warning you, this might not be easy to read.

 

Sometime in the beginning to middle of October, Renn will (more than likely) be undergoing a Right Temporal Lobectomy. Laymen's terms? They will be removing the entire right temporal lobe of Renn's brain. Not a piece of it, not a small section that is causing all the problems... the ENTIRE thing. Side effects include memory loss, vision impairment, some minor muscle function, as well as various more minor things.

 

I stopped breathing.

 

And here I thought things were actually looking up! I called the hubs and we broke down together. Oddly enough I had to get off the phone quickly because Renn had a seizure and I had to press my magic button. But all the positivity, the assuredness, the confidence, and strength I had, went flying out the window. This surgery would literally change my son forever. Is it worth it?

 

We will be coming back to this issue because I actually have a friend whose 6yo daughter just had this procedure done. I want to see if she will share her experience with us, so that we could talk about it in better detail. For now, let's put it in God's hands.

 

Thankfully, after that, we got a special package. A mommy friend of mine (and a mom to one of Renn's friends from school) had let me know something was coming, so we were quite happy to see it! Inside was a whole bunch of goodies... A Star Wars Angry Birds sticker book, some treats, Star Wars playing cards, a Star Wars water bottle, and a lightsaber. Of course, Renn went ballistic. He pulled out the lightsaber super fast, and it wasn't long before I noticed it had writing on it...

 

 

It said, "Get well soon Jedi Renn! -Rm 1"

His whole class signed this lightsaber. Both Renn and I burst into tears.

 

 

 

 Uncle Dumpkin and family showed up again, bringing much entertainment. Renn laughed and laughed to the point where I thought his sides would truly come undone. It was God's medicine for both our hearts.

 

 

 

 

 

 

We got a little gift from Daddy and Eli, too, and it was so yummy!! We just can't wait to come home.

 

 

 

 

 

All in all, we have had four "typical" seizures, as well as several in his sleep. We will be going through the second surgery tomorrow, so prayers for ease and comfort would be much appreciated.

 

Here's to the reality of Epilepsy... We knew the day would come where we would have to start making rough decisions. But to actually be faced with making them? Whole different caveat. The hubs cried out to God, the moment I had to hang up and said that he was listening. God gave him this passage, and I am still trying to hold tight to the promise he's made, here:

And getting into a boat he crossed over and came to his own city. And behold, some people brought to him a paralytic, lying on a bed. And when Jesus saw their faith, he said to the paralytic, “Take heart, my son; your sins are forgiven.” And behold, some of the scribes said to themselves, “This man is blaspheming.”  But Jesus, knowing  their thoughts, said, “Why do you think evil in your hearts? For which is easier, to say, ‘Your sins are forgiven,’ or to say, ‘Rise and walk’? But that you may know that the Son of Man has authority on earth to forgive sins”—he then said to the paralytic—“Rise, pick up your bed and go home.” And he rose and went home. When the crowds saw it, they were afraid, and they glorified God, who had given such authority to men.
Matthew 9:1-8

 

Hold Renn in your hearts again, tomorrow... Thanks, friends.

 

 

Behold, I will bring to it health and healing, and I will heal them and reveal to them abundance of prosperity and security.

Jeremiah 33:6 

Burr Hole Galaxy: Days 2 & 3

Doesn't the name Burr Hole sound sort of like it could be some kind of galaxy? I amuse myself...

Well, today is day three here at UCSF, but I'd like to do a quick recap of yesterday.

Renn did not sleep that first night AT ALL. It was impossible, as every nurse from San Francisco came to check on him. He woke up at 3am, and let me know his tummy hurt and that he was kind of hungry. He didn't want anything besides an orange popsicle. So, we obliged!
Twenty minutes later, we saw that orange popsicle once again. Poor kiddo... At that point, I knew he was angry... Angry at the situation, angry that he was here again, angry at me for putting him in through this. It took all I had to not sob uncontrollably. And it was that exact moment when I realized that it was the 27th, and my mom had been gone for two months.

We were already over that stupid day.

As time went on, our sweet Jedi warrior did not want to eat. (In fact, we barely got him to drink a milkshake at 2:45pm). He just wanted nothing. At about 12:30, however, we were informed that we had "A whole bunch of people wanting to come in and see Renn". WHAT? Renn was semi asleep, and thought maybe Daddy had come back, but I knew exactly who those people were...

My 86 year old grand mother lives in Marin County, and my Uncle, Aunt, and sweet cousins (who live in Southern CA) were visiting her. Apparently they'd all decided to trek over and see Mr. Renn. It was incredible to see familiar, loving faces, in a place where loneliness and boredom quickly consume you. I am grateful that they came...


Even though the Jedi was having a hard time  (it truly hurt for him to smile), I think it made a giant difference for him to be surrounded by people who loved him. He loves his Aunt and cousins so much. Of course lets not forget his Uncle "Dumpkin" , and all the antics that he provides.







Nana loved visiting with Renn... I think it was hard for her to see her great-grandson in such a state. He tried his best to wake up and interact with her. Poor baby, I could see it in his eyes that he was mad at himself for not being in a better mood. He told me today how excited he was to see them and that he wanted to give Nana a giant hug, "But Mommy, I wasn't myself. I wasn't happy."

Such a heart, that little man...



At around 3pm, I had finally had enough. Renn just wasn't recovering! So I sat with him, and said, "Honey, what's going on with you? You know it's safe to tell me. I think the bravest of all Jedis tell the truth. Will you tell me?"

He burst into tears and said, "But Jedis don't get scared. And if they're hurt, they don't say it because they are brave."

I held in my own tears... Our baby was in pain. Pain ALL DAY LONG, and didn't want to tell me because he wanted to be tough.

Heavenly Father, give me the same strength as my six year old...

Needless to say, we took care of that immediately. He had his typical giant-sized seizure (YAAAY!!), then went to sleep. He slept alllllll night, only waking when he was checked on. The nurse we had was so incredible. He (finally) brought out the faces chart- I call it "the faces of pain"- and Renn pointed to the saddest face on that sheet most of the night. It broke my heart. I felt so terrible. However, when I woke up at EIGHT-THIRTY this morning, I saw a smiling Renn, sitting up, and pointing to the happiest face on the chart.

I had my baby back!

 

The rest of the day today, we played video games together, we ate, and we spoke with both Dr. Genius and Dr. Incredi-Surgeon. The Doctors let me know that the MRI blip may have been nothing after all (worst part of our day), but that we were going to proceed as planned and have his removal surgery on Friday. Renn had another giant-sized seizure this afternoon, which will hopefully give us even more information.

 

Our precious boy is sleeping, once again... And tonight? No one will come in and check on us. We get to completely sleep, and I am so grateful.

 

Tomorrow should be an even better day!! Praising God always, and again I say, thank you for all your love, encouragement, and support.

 

 

My presence will go with you, and I will give you rest.
Exodus 33:14

Burr Hole Galaxy: Day 1

 Hi friends...

Yesterday was a difficult day. And I apologize for having to sum up everything into one post. I am sitting, typing, and fighting the inevitable sandman who is so frantically knocking at my eyelids. However, I know that I would sit and stoop (instead of truly sleep) about all the things I wanted to say in this post. It's the curse of a writer, I'm afraid, so here I am.

We arrived at UCSF right when we were supposed to, at 8am. Surgery was scheduled for 9am, but we quickly learned that it had been pushed back to 10am. And then, of course, we didn't get called back until 11:15am. But you know what was fascinating about him, yesterday?

 

 

 

His sense of calm. In this picture here to the right, he was walking down the hall to Admitting. He was looking at strangers, smiling, waving, saying hello, all while humming the Star Wars theme song. I walked behind him in awe. My husband was at a loss for words.Where did this precious boy come from??

We waited for what felt like 2.6 centuries, doing all we could to distract our brave Jedi Warrior (knowing all the while that we were trying to distract ourselves). Obi Wan Puppy was given a hospital bracelet because he was going to be by Renn's side for the whole stay. Our Jedi played games on the Wii system Child Life brought out for him and never once asked when it was our turn to go.

 

 

 

But when we finally went back, I saw fear in Renn's eyes for the very first time. It was ever so slight, ever so brief, but I still saw it... and it broke me. I honestly only knew to lie and tell my son that it was going to be okay... I knew it was a lie, because my own fear was getting in the way of being able to believe that statement myself. I could not guarantee, without a doubt, that everything was going to be "alright", why was I trying to convince him?

I prayed that the nerves would calm down in all three of us. I looked at my sweet husband, read his face, and knew he was praying for peace as well.

 

We got to the room where we were to have all the final discussions with all the people we were literally putting our son's life into the hands of. They gave Renn some "happy juice" and boy oh boy... Those were moments that I will never forget. It's not every day that you see your six year old act like a drunk, frat boy, but let me tell you- it was the laughter we needed to pass the time. He kept saying he felt like he was flying an airplane. And the smiles were contagious.

Then, it got hard. It became real. And this "little procedure" didn't feel so little. They were taking our first born son, putting him to sleep, and drilling four holes into his skull. They were going to put something foreign into these holes and lay it across and possibly INTO his brain. What, God, were we thinking?

It was time to let him go... It was time to trust him in the hands of people we'd only just met... It was time for this final four-part phase to get started. There was so much confusion, emotionally speaking; so much hope, fear, anger, resentment, love, and not to mention every memory of our little boy from birth till that moment came flooding in. But, we knew one thing... God, our true and most perfect Father, was taking care of him.

 

 

The hubs and I waited. And waited. And waited. And waited. We carried around Obi Wan Puppy and Renn's precious Blankie as though they were our infants. We met an incredible family, with a life changing story of their own. We all talked together for hours... 5 1/2, to be exact. It was bittersweet, and the last two hours felt like pure torture.

Finally, Dr. Incredi-Surgeon called... Renn was done. He came and found us quickly, and let us know all the details about the surgery. No hiccups, no roadblocks, nothing. But then, there was some seriously good news... The kind of good news that we've been praying to hear... Dr. Incredi-Surgeon let us know that the last MRI we had, they actually found something that they had never seen before. Something lit up bright as day, in an area of the brain that is most commonly an "issue area" when dealing with Epilepsy patients. Which means Renn truly has a shot of beating this thing.

 

Unnerved, relieved, and desperate to see our son, we paced the floor for thirty-five grueling minutes. And when we got to his door, an almost angelic-like halo covered him. Sure, it could have been the tears in my eyes, but there he was: Our baby boy who was born four weeks too early, so tiny, so frail... Who is now this brave boy, constantly blowing us away with his strength, generosity, kindness, and laughter. Our Jedi.

 



 

It took him some time to wake up. But when he did, in the groggiest, 80-year-old-chain-smoking-man voice, he said, "Where's Daddy? Can I play Angry Birds Star Wars?" He was safe. He was still him.

Last night proved to be stressful. A lot of frustration, pain, fear -on his part and mine-, swelling, blood pressure issues, heart rate scares, and nurses. (Holy on-the-hour-pestering, Batman!) But, we endured. He persevered.

 

In the next post, I will combine what went on all day today with whatever comes up during the day tomorrow. If you made it this far, thank you for loving us that much to read my obvious form of therapy. Thank you for praying for Renn. For spreading his story around, for loving him, for taking him in your hearts.

 

More tomorrow.

 

 

(photo: Tracey M. Cox- a sweet friend, a sister in Christ, author, and Renn supporter)

 

 

2 Corinthians 4:18
... as we look not to the things that are seen, but to the things unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.