Friday, December 6, 2013

The Dark Side Defeated: One Month Later

I am battling with some guilt, as I type, this cold, cold morning. I had all these grandiose ideas to write a few very important posts, but I'll be honest... We're tired. After your life takes a complete, dramatic, traumatic turn around, there's not much else that you want to do save spend time with one another. I, personally, haven't even gotten a regular routine down! Dishes have stayed in the sink for far too long, laundry (though clean) has stayed unfolded since we got home.

"Mom? Do I have any socks?"
"Yes! Let me scale Mt. Lots-O-Clothes... I'll be back in four days!"

That being said I have, what my very Pentecostal momma would have called, a praise report! Renn, our wonderful, incredible, and brave Jedi, is...


Can you believe it? We are beside ourselves! And the good news continues... The Friday before Thanksgiving, Renn returned to school for the last hour of class. They were having a harvest party. He went to two other classes first, to give flowers to the teachers and thank the classes for sending all the wonderful and uplifting notes that they sent. Yeah, THAT was emotional! But as we walked to his class, I felt his little hand grab mine. He squeezed. HARD. He was nervous, and it showed.
I crouched down beside him and said, "Buddy, you can do this."
He hugged me and said, "I know, Mom. I just don't know if they will like me, now."
I realized something in that moment that may have seemed obvious to the rest of the world, but we just hadn't grasped it yet. Renn had changed. It wasn't that the seizures were gone. No, it wasn't that simple. HE had changed in many areas of his teeny life. He recognized it. But the hubs and I were shocked because well, we hadn't.
We walked into Room 1. The class was busy and full of people. The parents were running around getting plates of food, his wonderful teacher was turning on a movie... truly, no one noticed Renn.
Until our sweet baby's voice softly said, "Hi Dawson!" (his closest friend in class). Just like in a "It's Renn!" "Oh LOOK!!" "Hi Renn!" Renn's back!!" made the tears stream down our faces. Renn was covered in hugs, handed things, and this beautiful little girl (have I mentioned her before?) who claims she LOVES my son, begged me to take this picture.
movie, time stood still. The eruption of  whispers

It was incredible to witness.

I looked over at my kiddo who was finally sitting at his lonely, singled out desk, eating his food. He had just gone through hell. Would you know it?

No way.

His teacher was precious and helped Renn move his desk so that he could sit by other kids. I held my breath because I knew that the very reason he had to have his desk so close to the teacher's desk, and so far away from all the other students was because of this wretched Epilepsy. But I also knew that in a matter of minutes, our Jedi with boundary issues would have his hands in the other kids' food. He would be in the other students' faces. He'd annoy, and we'd be moving his desk back.
But once again, he shocked us all.

He held still. He ate his food and calmly talked to others.

Our baby... He was... Free.

His teacher came over to us in tears. She was amazed. And the fact that SHE could see a difference, meant we weren't crazy. He just might be able to stay in school after all. His homework that we'd been doing at home had been a breeze to do with him. His handwriting has even changed!

 In this picture to the right, the top half was his handwriting before surgery. The bottom half was last

The party continued. He was genuinely thrilled to be back. As we left, the Principal saw him and embraced him. She told me how much she had missed playing basketball with him at recess (we didn't even know he did that with her!). Then, many staff members walked by and said hello, gave hugs, and told him how brave they thought he was. It was magical.

In these weeks that we've been home, we are doing all we can to adjust back. Everyday, we wait for a seizure. Everyday, the hubs and I watch our Jedi with laser-like glares and wait.

But they just don't come.

His scar is healing quite well. It's suuuuuuuper itchy, so any parents going through this, please prepare for that. The stitches are almost all dissolved, and his hair is already long enough that I will be giving him a haircut this weekend! He's lost a tooth (which he is VERY proud of), and is moments away from losing his top, front two. Yes, he is eager to sing the All I Want for Christmas is My Two Front Teeth song!

One thing that we have experienced (that we weren't quite prepared for) is the MAJOR shift in emotions that our Jedi has had. I stubbed my toe once and was grumbling about it. Renn came in from another room in full tears, wailing, "I'm so sorry! Do you still love me? Mommy, I'm SORRY!"

However, he is reading like no other and is finally grasping math concepts that he couldn't before. He is maturing at a high speed. It's unreal.

His friends have been thrilled to see him, after the two weeks he had to stay home and remain pretty isolated. He has been back at Cub Scouts and will even be in the Christmas parade tomorrow night! There's no stopping this kid!

We went to our church's Thanksgiving dinner, and spoke to the congregation about what God has done in Renn's life. I have no idea if there was a dry eye in the place, but certainly, the hubs and I couldn't contain ourselves when Renn spoke.

"When I was sleeping during the surgery, God told me to that He was with me and that I was going to be okay."

I wasn't aware of that until about two hours before he told the church. He told us that God comforted him while he was sleeping. And that it was God who helped heal him.

Thank you, Father.

Renn is finishing up his first week back at school, as I type. The hubs is back at work after taking a long, LONG time off to help our family heal. Eli is watching a movie and laughing in a way that melts my heart, and I... I am getting back to a routine.

We celebrate this Christmas, and thank God for the miracles He has given us. But for today:

One month down... A lifetime to go, little Jedi. We are so, SO proud to be your parents.

Praise the Lord! Praise God in his sanctuary; praise him in his mighty heavens! Praise him for his mighty deeds; praise him according to his excellent greatness! Praise him with trumpet sound; praise him with lute and harp! Praise him with tambourine and dance; praise him with strings and pipe! Praise him with sounding cymbals; praise him with loud clashing cymbals! ...
Psalm 150:1-6


  1. Praise God in the highest!

    Tears, and joy, and so much love as I read this post. Thank you for sharing so deeply in this whole journey. Love you all!

  2. Doing a dance of praise! Now I get why David danced... there's nothing else to do but sing and dance and weep with joy! Love you guys!

  3. So awesome! Yay Renn! Yay Bethany, Eli and Rick! Yay God!

  4. YAYYYYYY!!! GO RENN!!! :D :D :D :D :D :D!!!

  5. Wow! This is exactly what I wanted this post to say. Wow.

  6. Praise God! I am so glad I stopped by to check on how Renn is doing. Way to go Renn and what a testimony!